Swirling: Relax its a LOVE thing.

For years when interracial relationships were brought up I would immediately think of a black man and a white woman. I mean I grew up with it, my cousins are mixed. Not often, if ever did I hear about black women dating white men. Here lately it seems as though this is some craze or maybe a fad. I don't know.  Some few it positively and some few it negatively and then we have those that are extreme with it. Its still a taboo if you ask me. People still have there thoughts and ideas of the reasons, the how's, and the whys. I've heard so many things its ridiculous. However I understand that with the way the world is going its hard to grasp interracial relationships. When people don't understand something they tend to create false situations.

I myself don't have an answer to why. If you would have asked me 3 years ago would I have been with a white man I probably would have laughed straight in your face, not because I was against it but because I don't approach men and let me be honest white men don't approach us out of fear. That same tired ass line men use about black women with attitudes has filtered over to the Caucasian race. I'm not here to argue or debate about this either. However,  I never imagined that one night in a local club would lead to The Snow's your everyday couple that happens to include a white man and a black woman. For me our dating wasn't intentional, for him maybe he likes what he likes and that happens to be sista's. I did not set out to find a white man and marry him. I wasn't looking for a white man that I could run over, have mixed babies with, nor was I attempting to piss my brotha's off. I simply fell In love with an amazing person that happens to be white. He's a little country and a little hip hop. He's simply just my husband, Jacob.  I'm here to share some of my thoughts. I'm not here to change your mind or your stance I'm here to tell my truth on this touchy subject.

Let's go......

First: The weird stares need to STOP! lol Jesus as God is my witness you will get stared right back out if you are awkwardly staring at my mixed family. We are not some attraction at the zoo. Contrary to what you may think we are PEOPLE.

Second: Its possible to have Natural hair and date a white man. I've lost count on how many times people assume we cant be natural because we are with white men. People ask all the time "how does your husband feel about your hair?" My husband is and has been 100% supportive of my natural journey. Jacob know he getting whatever under this bonnet!! TUH!

Now let me say this..... Ladies this does not mean I just go around any type of way. Your leave out, weave, or whatever style you wear still needs to be laid, although he may have no clue what that is or  what its supposed to look like. You are still a black woman laying next to this white man. SIS don't do it!! Don't be in that shower playing around with Josh! LOL When we first got married he had some Head and Shoulders, Suave and other shit. "Oh no baby"!

Sorry mama, but Thirdly the meat ain't always pink or small. Sex is sex. I will be honest, I thought the same thing. "I aint messing with no pink meat" " I bet its small" blah blah blah well ISSA LIE. Bad sex can come from any race. White men got rhythm to now! Black men seem to think that white men cant handle shapely black women. I've overheard several conversations such as this one. ISSA LIE.

Lastly, but most importantly it is very possible to be treated like the QUEEN YOU ARE by a white man!! I'm living proof of this. My husband loves me according to how I need to be loved not based on the color of my skin. He doesn't sugarcoat shit for me due to the struggles I have as a black woman. He doesn't treat me special because of the things his race did to our people he treats me special because every woman deserves that. Point. Blank. Period. He loves me because I am a woman, his WOMAN. He knows my worth and understands what I bring to the table. He knows that there's not another like me. He loves me as Chasity not as the black woman he met at the club. But don't get it confused he knows I'm a beautiful black, strong, unique, rare QUEEN.


We don't agree on everything like any other relationship.  We were raised differently but respect is respect. We don't make each other feel bad about our differences.  I taught him how to make collard greens, he taught me how to shoot, I taught him how take a sew in out, he taught me how to save money, the exchange is always even and limitless in our home. I LUH HIM!

Besides him looking like Tommy from Power and being hilarious our marriage is pretty normal.
He is still very much a man, so I wont get on here and be like he will never cheat, white men don't cheat blah blah. I cant say that because men are men. That first has to be understood.  If you want a white man because you never want to experience heartbreak or because you want someone that you can run circles around ABORT MISSION. Men of all races cheat, lie and possibly can be shit storms. We argue and get mad at each other. There's days that I could fight him. But if he cheats on me he should watch out because I'm awesome shot thanks to him. I truly believe that love is love. I don't see my husbands color and he doesn't see mine. We are completely aware of the difference but we don't let it define our relationship.

He is always on time LOL me not so much. It drives him crazy. For him I try really hard to be on time. He loves chicken just as much as me. He loves trap music and country but so do I. I'm not his slave and he does not allow me to push him around. Its not often that I get told NO but believe he puts his foot down if needed. He cooks and he cleans. His family has not disowned him. SMH. He's country so he thinks a possum is an exotic pet. (insert eye roll). ROLL TIDE!!

I believe my first real white man crush was Rhett Butler from "Gone with the Wind". But with that being said some may never approve or agree and that's completely fine. I just say relax, live and let live!

Be you, Do you , For you!!